Диппер становится мужиком — Диппер, рассерженный тем, что все считают его слабаком, отправляется в лес и встречает там мужикотавров — наполовину мужиков, наполовину минотавров; они обещают сделать его мужиком. Но в ходе тренировок мужикотавры назначают Дипперу сложное испытание — убить Мультимедведя. В это время Мэйбл хочет сделать из Стэна первоклассного джентльмена.

Предыдущая серия S01 E05 От заката до рассвета

Следующая серия S01 E07 Диппер и атака клонов

Диппер становится мужиком

Dipper vs. Manliness

Сезон: 01Серия: 06

Описание

Диппер, рассерженный тем, что все считают его слабаком, отправляется в лес и встречает там мужикотавров — наполовину мужиков, наполовину минотавров; они обещают сделать его мужиком. Но в ходе тренировок мужикотавры назначают Дипперу сложное испытание — убить Мультимедведя. В это время Мэйбл хочет сделать из Стэна первоклассного джентльмена.

Субтитры

00:00:04,219 --> 00:00:06,298 I like to get my Christmas shopping done early.
00:00:06,937 --> 00:00:09,111 Do you have anything that's in the spirit of the season?
00:00:09,175 --> 00:00:11,125 Uh... How about these crystals?
00:00:11,789 --> 00:00:13,630 That looks like broken glass.
00:00:13,682 --> 00:00:14,706 What are you, a cop?
00:00:14,833 --> 00:00:16,336 Oh! What is that new thing?
00:00:17,262 --> 00:00:18,221 Grunkle Stan?
00:00:18,286 --> 00:00:19,693 Can we go to the diner?
00:00:19,756 --> 00:00:22,218 We're hungry!
00:00:22,282 --> 00:00:23,912 Hungry!
00:00:27,749 --> 00:00:30,178 Yeah, sure. Soon as this yahoo makes up his mind.
00:00:30,242 --> 00:00:32,288 Do you have this in another animal?
00:00:33,023 --> 00:00:34,717 I'm fine locking him inside, if you are.
00:00:38,010 --> 00:00:39,992 Puma shirt, panther shirt.
00:00:40,056 --> 00:00:42,389 Puma shirt, panther shirt.
00:00:42,454 --> 00:00:43,956 Puma shirt...
00:00:45,427 --> 00:00:46,386 Panther shirt!
00:01:30,374 --> 00:01:32,963 Shoo! Git!
00:01:35,265 --> 00:01:37,503 Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.
00:01:38,174 --> 00:01:40,124 Go! Go! Go! Go!
00:01:46,486 --> 00:01:49,139 Lazy Susan, there's my little ray of sunshine.
00:01:49,203 --> 00:01:50,706 Where were you yesterday?
00:01:50,833 --> 00:01:52,495 I got hit by a bus.
00:01:53,679 --> 00:01:54,734 Hilarious!
00:01:54,797 --> 00:01:56,067 Thank you!
00:01:59,304 --> 00:02:00,680 You do split plates, right?
00:02:01,095 --> 00:02:04,452 Maybe! Wink!
00:02:04,804 --> 00:02:07,169 Great! We'll all split a one-fourth of the Number Seven,
00:02:07,329 --> 00:02:10,589 plus a free salad dressing for the lady, and a small plate of ketchup for the boy.
00:02:10,717 --> 00:02:13,147 But, Grunkle Stan, I want pancakes!
00:02:13,306 --> 00:02:15,576 With the fancy flour they use these days?
00:02:15,704 --> 00:02:18,070 What am I, made of money? Tap-tap.
00:02:18,134 --> 00:02:19,093 Aw...
00:02:24,101 --> 00:02:25,974 Don't worry, guys, pancakes are on me!
00:02:26,094 --> 00:02:28,267 I'm gonna win some by beating that manliness tester.
00:02:28,715 --> 00:02:29,866 "Manliness tester?"
00:02:29,930 --> 00:02:30,889 "Beating?"
00:02:33,511 --> 00:02:35,716 He says... He says he's...
00:02:37,251 --> 00:02:38,466 What? What's so funny?
00:02:38,754 --> 00:02:40,320 Oh, no offense, Dipper,
00:02:40,384 --> 00:02:44,135 but you're not exactly Manly Mannington.
00:02:45,019 --> 00:02:49,270 Hey! I am too Manly Manny... Or whatever it is you said!
00:02:49,335 --> 00:02:51,029 Look, face the music, kid.
00:02:51,125 --> 00:02:53,490 You got no muscles, you smell like baby wipes.
00:02:53,554 --> 00:02:56,592 And let's not forget last Tuesday's incident.
00:02:56,784 --> 00:03:00,299 Disco girl, coming through
00:03:00,364 --> 00:03:02,442 That girl is you
00:03:02,538 --> 00:03:04,200 Don't come in, don't come in!
00:03:04,264 --> 00:03:07,652 You were listening to girly, Icelandic pop sensation Babba?
00:03:07,972 --> 00:03:10,434 No! I wasn't... It's not important!
00:03:10,498 --> 00:03:12,959 Look, come on, guys, I'm plenty masculine.
00:03:13,023 --> 00:03:14,462 You see this chest hair?
00:03:14,526 --> 00:03:17,307 -Put it away! Put it away! -So smooth! My eyes!
00:03:17,754 --> 00:03:18,713 Oh, man!
00:03:21,302 --> 00:03:25,234 Fine, family-of-little-faith! Get ready to eat your words!
00:03:25,299 --> 00:03:27,377 And a plate of delicious pancakes.
00:03:33,067 --> 00:03:36,999 All right, Dipper. Time to manhandle this man-handle.
00:03:40,547 --> 00:03:43,041 And a one, and a two...
00:03:43,137 --> 00:03:44,415 Quit stalling!
00:03:59,153 --> 00:04:00,144 Aw, what?
00:04:00,208 --> 00:04:01,742 This thing must be broken!
00:04:01,807 --> 00:04:04,492 It's totally broken, guys! It's like a million years old.
00:04:04,555 --> 00:04:07,209 Probably ran out of steam power, or...
00:04:08,999 --> 00:04:11,333 It's rickety, man. You shouldn't even...
00:04:15,201 --> 00:04:17,566 Yeah! Pancakes for everyone!
00:04:23,769 --> 00:04:25,303 I need to get some chest hair, and fast.
00:04:26,933 --> 00:04:29,650 I'm fine! Everything's fine.
00:04:30,162 --> 00:04:32,559 Yeesh! How am I related to that?
00:04:32,623 --> 00:04:36,843 Come on, Grunkle Stan. I'm sure deep down you have a soft side, too.
00:04:37,003 --> 00:04:40,231 Ha! Nothing in here but a cold, dark, empty soul.
00:04:41,127 --> 00:04:42,118 Food!
00:04:42,182 --> 00:04:44,772 Thanks, there, sugar pot. I mean, honey wasp.
00:04:44,835 --> 00:04:46,498 Kitten baby. Baby, baby cow...
00:04:46,625 --> 00:04:49,375 Silly! Silly man.
00:04:49,694 --> 00:04:50,685 What was that about?
00:04:50,814 --> 00:04:54,138 Nothing. I don't want to talk about it. Talk about what? Why is this table wet?
00:04:54,202 --> 00:04:55,480 Wait just a second.
00:04:55,801 --> 00:04:58,869 I think I have an idea happening here. You...
00:04:58,933 --> 00:05:00,275 -No! -And her...
00:05:00,340 --> 00:05:01,299 -Stop it! -Oh!
00:05:01,714 --> 00:05:04,528 -Oh, boy. -You have a thing for Lazy Susan!
00:05:04,591 --> 00:05:06,382 You do have a soft side!
00:05:06,446 --> 00:05:09,930 But... Keep it down, will you? All right, I admit it, okay?
00:05:10,058 --> 00:05:11,465 It would be nice if she liked me.
00:05:11,529 --> 00:05:13,159 But I've been out of the game for so long,
00:05:13,222 --> 00:05:14,438 I wouldn't know where to start!
00:05:14,502 --> 00:05:16,643 I mean, look at her! She's so classy.
00:05:16,708 --> 00:05:19,169 Spin, you dumb pies, spin!
00:05:19,681 --> 00:05:23,900 Grunkle Stan, you are a cranky, gross, weird old man.
00:05:23,964 --> 00:05:26,042 But we will get Lazy Susan to like you
00:05:26,106 --> 00:05:28,408 because nothing is stronger than the power of...
00:05:28,471 --> 00:05:30,006 -Love? -Mabel.
00:05:30,837 --> 00:05:32,436 To victory!
00:05:35,888 --> 00:05:39,437 "Not manly enough." Stupid diner. Stupid lumberjack.
00:05:41,674 --> 00:05:45,575 Another hydrant destroyed! It's a gosh-danged mystery.
00:05:45,798 --> 00:05:48,100 Wanna take off our uniforms and run around in circles?
00:05:48,675 --> 00:05:50,050 Quit reading my mind.
00:05:54,142 --> 00:05:57,211 Oh! I'm sorry, I was looking for the mailman.
00:05:57,467 --> 00:06:00,056 Oh! What, are you saying I'm not a "male" man?
00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:01,207 Is that what you're trying to say?
00:06:01,270 --> 00:06:04,372 I'm not male? I'm... I'm not a man? Is that... Is that what you're getting at?
00:06:04,435 --> 00:06:05,490 Are you crying?
00:06:09,998 --> 00:06:11,884 Two,
00:06:11,948 --> 00:06:13,354 three,
00:06:14,826 --> 00:06:16,583 four...
00:06:19,365 --> 00:06:20,995 No chest hair yet.
00:06:21,059 --> 00:06:23,936 Is it physical? Is it mental? What's the secret?
00:06:27,005 --> 00:06:29,179 You said it, brother! I need help.
00:06:35,349 --> 00:06:38,289 For the love of all that's holy, run!
00:06:49,670 --> 00:06:50,757 Wait, sorry.
00:06:50,821 --> 00:06:52,271 Aah!
00:07:12,975 --> 00:07:15,852 Please don't eat me! I haven't showered in, like, a week.
00:07:15,916 --> 00:07:18,729 And I'm... I'm, like, all elbows! Elbows and gristle!
00:07:19,273 --> 00:07:20,523 You
00:07:21,287 --> 00:07:22,405 gonna finish that?
00:07:23,417 --> 00:07:24,076 No.
00:07:25,378 --> 00:07:27,713 Can't believe it. Part animal, part human.
00:07:27,776 --> 00:07:29,151 Are you some kind of minotaur?
00:07:29,214 --> 00:07:32,955 I'm a manotaur! Half man, half, uh...
00:07:33,019 --> 00:07:34,297 Half taur!
00:07:34,393 --> 00:07:36,472 So did I, like, summon you or...
00:07:36,536 --> 00:07:39,668 The smell of jerky summoned me! Jerky!
00:07:50,282 --> 00:07:51,776 I smell
00:07:52,935 --> 00:07:55,204 emotional issues.
00:07:55,492 --> 00:07:58,594 I got problems, manotaur. Man-related problems.
00:08:00,863 --> 00:08:03,836 -Well, my own uncle called me a wimp. -Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:06,266 And I kind of flunked this manliness video game thing.
00:08:06,329 --> 00:08:07,384 Mmm...
00:08:07,576 --> 00:08:09,623 Hey! You know, you seem pretty manly.
00:08:09,686 --> 00:08:11,477 Maybe you could give me some pointers?
00:08:11,892 --> 00:08:15,632 Hmm. Very well! Climb atop my back hair, child!
00:08:16,196 --> 00:08:17,770 Uh... Okay.
00:08:17,934 --> 00:08:19,980 Yes! Yes!
00:08:25,351 --> 00:08:26,533 Dude, watch out!
00:08:32,384 --> 00:08:33,343 Whoa!
00:08:37,658 --> 00:08:39,320 This place is amazing!
00:08:39,385 --> 00:08:41,526 The gnomes live in the trees,
00:08:41,590 --> 00:08:44,340 the mer-people live in the water, 'cause they're losers!
00:08:44,403 --> 00:08:48,176 But we manotaurs crash in the man cave!
00:08:49,615 --> 00:08:54,218 Beasts! I have brought you a hairless child!
00:08:54,921 --> 00:08:56,200 -'Sup. -Huh?
00:08:56,328 --> 00:09:00,292 This is Pubertor, Testosteraur, Pituitor.
00:09:00,356 --> 00:09:02,754 And I'm Chutzpar. And you are?
00:09:02,977 --> 00:09:04,255 My name's Dipper.
00:09:05,447 --> 00:09:06,657 Weak!
00:09:06,717 --> 00:09:08,859 The, uh, Destructor?
00:09:09,434 --> 00:09:11,256 -Yeah, that's better. -Yeah.
00:09:13,111 --> 00:09:17,298 Dipper the Destructor wants us to teach him the secrets to our manliness!
00:09:17,523 --> 00:09:20,432 I need your help. Look at this, guys. Look at this!
00:09:21,039 --> 00:09:23,436 I must confer with the high council.
00:09:23,628 --> 00:09:25,546 So, teach him our man secrets or what?
00:09:25,610 --> 00:09:27,593 He's a human! I don't like him.
00:09:27,689 --> 00:09:29,223 I don't like your face!
00:09:33,635 --> 00:09:35,424 I like these guys.
00:09:39,229 --> 00:09:43,609 Okay, Grunkle Stan! Welcome to the first day of whatever is left of your life!
00:09:43,801 --> 00:09:45,910 First, a "before" picture.
00:09:48,180 --> 00:09:50,354 I never miss a scrap-book-or-tunity!
00:09:50,418 --> 00:09:52,399 Diddlydum... Memories
00:09:52,975 --> 00:09:54,893 Bleep. Let's start out with some role-playing.
00:09:55,117 --> 00:09:56,556 Soos will play Lazy Susan.
00:09:57,035 --> 00:09:58,314 I'm soft, like a woman.
00:09:58,537 --> 00:10:00,999 Grunkle Stan, show me how you approach a woman.
00:10:01,414 --> 00:10:04,579 Remember, this is a safe, non-judgmental environment.
00:10:04,643 --> 00:10:07,616 I'll just be right off to the side, judging you on a scale from one to ten.
00:10:12,508 --> 00:10:13,594 Can I borrow some money?
00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:16,951 This is going to be harder than I thought.
00:10:17,143 --> 00:10:19,509 After a lot of punching, we have decided
00:10:19,573 --> 00:10:22,258 to deny your request to learn our manly secrets.
00:10:22,609 --> 00:10:23,760 Denied!
00:10:24,208 --> 00:10:25,327 Denied?
00:10:26,541 --> 00:10:28,715 Okay. Fine. That's okay with me.
00:10:28,843 --> 00:10:31,177 Obviously you guys think it would be too hard to train me!
00:10:31,336 --> 00:10:33,894 Maybe you're not man enough to try!
00:10:34,118 --> 00:10:35,301 Huh?
00:10:35,364 --> 00:10:36,867 Not man enough?
00:10:36,995 --> 00:10:38,306 Destructor...
00:10:38,370 --> 00:10:39,872 Not man enough?
00:10:40,064 --> 00:10:41,214 He didn't mean it.
00:10:41,279 --> 00:10:44,859 I have three Y chromosomes, six Adam's apples,
00:10:44,923 --> 00:10:47,928 pecs on my abs and fists for nipples!
00:10:48,472 --> 00:10:51,349 Seems to me you're scared to teach me how to be a man.
00:10:51,636 --> 00:10:53,650 Hey, do you guys hear that? It sounds like...
00:10:54,770 --> 00:10:56,847 Oh, that's weird...
00:10:56,911 --> 00:10:58,381 Is that...
00:10:58,446 --> 00:11:00,491 That sounds like... Yeah, a bunch of chickens.
00:11:02,793 --> 00:11:03,976 I feel all weird.
00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:06,789 He's using some sort of brain magic.
00:11:07,300 --> 00:11:09,379 After a second round of deliberation,
00:11:09,570 --> 00:11:12,000 we have decided to help you become a man!
00:11:12,224 --> 00:11:14,366 Man! Man! Man! Man! Man!
00:11:14,526 --> 00:11:17,595 Great! Thanks, guys. Whatever it is, I will not let you down.
00:11:20,247 --> 00:11:22,613 Being a man is about conquering your fears!
00:11:23,029 --> 00:11:28,528 For your first man-task, you must plunge your fist into the pain hole!
00:11:29,862 --> 00:11:31,001 The what?
00:11:32,460 --> 00:11:34,026 Pain hole, shmain hole...
00:11:41,091 --> 00:11:42,626 Are you sure this is really necessary?
00:11:42,689 --> 00:11:44,352 You want to be a man, don't you?
00:11:44,544 --> 00:11:47,037 Man! Man! Man! Man! Man! Man!
00:11:52,919 --> 00:11:56,659 All right, let's try to get that inner beauty on the outside!
00:11:57,139 --> 00:11:58,225 Smile harder.
00:11:59,568 --> 00:12:00,727 Harder.
00:12:01,519 --> 00:12:03,053 Perfect. Soos!
00:12:03,500 --> 00:12:05,163 -'Sup, hambone? -What do you think?
00:12:10,306 --> 00:12:13,231 This is going to take some really great training music.
00:12:17,502 --> 00:12:19,228 When a tiger roars
00:12:19,293 --> 00:12:21,722 And the mountain cries
00:12:22,745 --> 00:12:27,029 You gotta dream the dream You gotta win the prize
00:12:27,572 --> 00:12:31,633 You're gonna go the miles You're gonna face the trials
00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:36,108 Never miss out on the sights to see You gotta believe your beliefs are real
00:12:36,460 --> 00:12:38,409 Now you're drinking from a fire hydrant
00:12:38,505 --> 00:12:40,552 Teach your uncle how to wear a cummerbund
00:12:40,615 --> 00:12:42,821 Now you're gonna jump a crazy gorge
00:12:42,885 --> 00:12:45,123 Keep on shaving that hairy uncle
00:12:45,666 --> 00:12:46,657 Uh...
00:12:46,721 --> 00:12:48,831 I don't really know what's happening in this part
00:12:49,694 --> 00:12:50,685 Yeow!
00:12:50,749 --> 00:12:55,097 Your heart's on fire and the fire is in your heart
00:12:57,431 --> 00:12:59,285 Who wants to rub this on my back?
00:12:59,477 --> 00:13:02,450 Guys, I just wanna say that these last few hours have been...
00:13:02,610 --> 00:13:04,847 I feel like there's really been some growth.
00:13:05,135 --> 00:13:06,509 I have a growth!
00:13:07,085 --> 00:13:09,962 Glurk, you are hilarious today!
00:13:10,762 --> 00:13:13,031 It's just, you guys took me under your wing
00:13:13,095 --> 00:13:14,629 and have just been so supportive.
00:13:14,694 --> 00:13:17,123 -Oh, stop. -No, you know what? You really have been.
00:13:17,187 --> 00:13:19,137 I feel like I'm finally becoming a man here.
00:13:19,201 --> 00:13:22,333 Not yet, Destructor! One final task remains...
00:13:22,877 --> 00:13:24,764 -Hey, quit it! -You quit it!
00:13:24,827 --> 00:13:26,745 The deadliest trial of all!
00:13:26,809 --> 00:13:30,326 I've survived 49 other trials. Whatever it is, bring it on!
00:13:30,518 --> 00:13:31,604 Yeah!
00:13:41,547 --> 00:13:44,008 Behold our leader, Leaderar!
00:13:46,405 --> 00:13:48,548 Is he, like, the oldest or wisest or...
00:13:48,836 --> 00:13:50,178 Greetings, young...
00:13:51,968 --> 00:13:54,845 Nah, he's just the offering. That is Leaderar!
00:14:00,503 --> 00:14:03,284 You! You wish to be man?
00:14:05,906 --> 00:14:06,865 Yeah!
00:14:06,993 --> 00:14:10,861 Then you must do heroic act. Go to highest mountain.
00:14:16,040 --> 00:14:19,972 And bring back head of the Multi-Bear!
00:14:22,338 --> 00:14:24,831 The "Multi-Bear"? Is that some sort of bear?
00:14:25,119 --> 00:14:26,557 He's our sworn enemy!
00:14:26,749 --> 00:14:30,746 Conquer him, and your mansformation will be complete.
00:14:30,937 --> 00:14:33,271 Conquer? I don't know, man.
00:14:33,558 --> 00:14:35,700 Destructor, is this yours?
00:14:36,148 --> 00:14:38,162 Uh, no! I don't know whose that is.
00:14:38,354 --> 00:14:40,559 I was just borrowing it. It's friend's, not mine.
00:14:42,094 --> 00:14:43,213 I don't know about this.
00:14:43,309 --> 00:14:44,268 Uh...
00:14:47,145 --> 00:14:48,263 Hmm.
00:14:48,455 --> 00:14:50,853 I shall conquer the Multi-Bear!
00:14:55,122 --> 00:14:56,112 I'm okay.
00:15:31,420 --> 00:15:33,338 I'm coming for you, Multi-Bear.
00:15:34,489 --> 00:15:39,540 Okay, Grunkle Stan. You started like this, but you became...
00:15:40,691 --> 00:15:42,194 Can I scratch myself now?
00:15:42,257 --> 00:15:46,350 No! No, no, no! Is that throw-up on your shirt?
00:15:46,829 --> 00:15:48,044 I don't know how to answer that.
00:15:49,387 --> 00:15:51,401 Face it, Mabel, your uncle's unfixable.
00:15:51,624 --> 00:15:53,638 Like that spinning pie trolley-thing in the diner.
00:15:55,461 --> 00:15:57,187 Grunkle Stan, come with me.
00:15:57,602 --> 00:15:59,169 And leave your pants at home!
00:15:59,361 --> 00:16:00,416 With pleasure!
00:16:05,115 --> 00:16:06,937 What is a Multi-Bear?
00:16:12,563 --> 00:16:14,002 Oh, that's a Multi-Bear.
00:16:16,144 --> 00:16:18,413 Bear heads. Silence!
00:16:20,268 --> 00:16:22,793 Child, why have you come here?
00:16:23,081 --> 00:16:26,725 Multi-Bear, I seek your head! Or one of them, anyway.
00:16:26,790 --> 00:16:28,132 There's like, what, six? Six heads?
00:16:28,196 --> 00:16:31,456 This is foolish! Leave now or die!
00:16:32,991 --> 00:16:34,142 So be it!
00:16:49,966 --> 00:16:51,500 Ha!
00:17:03,392 --> 00:17:05,502 A real man shows no mercy!
00:17:07,101 --> 00:17:08,539 Very well, warrior.
00:17:08,891 --> 00:17:11,928 But will you grant a magical beast one last request?
00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:13,558 Uh... Okay.
00:17:13,878 --> 00:17:17,107 I wish to die listening to my favorite song.
00:17:19,057 --> 00:17:21,167 Tape is already in there. You could just hit any...
00:17:21,326 --> 00:17:22,669 Yeah, yeah, that's it. Press and hold.
00:17:22,733 --> 00:17:26,730 Disco girl coming through That girl is you...
00:17:27,017 --> 00:17:30,693 You listen to Icelandic pop group Babba? I love Babba.
00:17:30,853 --> 00:17:32,867 I thought I was the only one.
00:17:33,027 --> 00:17:34,529 All the manotaurs make fun of me
00:17:34,594 --> 00:17:37,598 because I know all the words to the song Disco Girl.
00:17:37,663 --> 00:17:38,622 Oh, you mean...
00:17:38,685 --> 00:17:40,252 Disco girl
00:17:40,507 --> 00:17:42,298 Coming through
00:17:42,362 --> 00:17:44,599 That girl is you
00:17:44,791 --> 00:17:47,157 Ooh ooh
00:17:48,404 --> 00:17:51,632 Oh! This is crazy. Finally, someone who understands...
00:17:52,048 --> 00:17:53,103 Oh, yeah.
00:17:53,167 --> 00:17:56,300 I guess I'm supposed to kill you? Or I'll never be a man?
00:17:56,460 --> 00:17:57,866 I accept my fate.
00:17:58,090 --> 00:17:59,752 No. Really?
00:17:59,848 --> 00:18:01,031 It's for the best.
00:18:06,466 --> 00:18:07,489 I'm not gonna do it!
00:18:07,585 --> 00:18:11,005 You were told the price of manhood is the Multi-Bear's head!
00:18:11,453 --> 00:18:15,065 Listen, Leaderar, all right? You, too, Testosteraur, Pituitor, and...
00:18:15,257 --> 00:18:17,271 I don't know, whatever your name is, Beardy.
00:18:17,334 --> 00:18:18,293 It's Beardy.
00:18:18,358 --> 00:18:21,235 You keep telling me that being a man means doing all these tasks,
00:18:21,299 --> 00:18:23,025 and being aggro all the time.
00:18:23,441 --> 00:18:25,582 But I'm starting to think that stuff's malarkey!
00:18:27,245 --> 00:18:28,843 You heard me! Malarkey!
00:18:28,907 --> 00:18:31,592 So maybe I don't have muscles, or hair in certain places.
00:18:31,657 --> 00:18:35,109 And sure, when a girly pop song comes on the radio sometimes I leave it on.
00:18:35,268 --> 00:18:37,091 'Cause dang it, Top 40 hits
00:18:37,155 --> 00:18:39,776 are in the Top 40 for a reason! They're catchy!
00:18:39,936 --> 00:18:41,950 Destructor! What are you saying?
00:18:42,014 --> 00:18:44,379 I'm saying the Multi-Bear is a really nice guy.
00:18:44,444 --> 00:18:46,553 And you're a bunch of jerks if you want me to cut off his head!
00:18:49,974 --> 00:18:53,363 Kill the Multi-Bear or never be a man!
00:18:54,257 --> 00:18:55,696 Then I guess I will never be a man.
00:18:57,263 --> 00:18:58,254 Weak!
00:19:00,683 --> 00:19:01,962 Lame!
00:19:02,378 --> 00:19:05,319 Hey, guys. Who wants to go build something and knock it down?
00:19:06,470 --> 00:19:10,913 Man! Man! Man! Man! Man! Man! Man! Man!
00:19:13,630 --> 00:19:15,389 Spin, spin.
00:19:17,626 --> 00:19:20,504 Lazy Susan. Listen, I know he's not much to look at,
00:19:20,631 --> 00:19:22,326 but you're always fixing stuff in the diner.
00:19:22,613 --> 00:19:23,892 And if you like fixing stuff,
00:19:23,956 --> 00:19:26,610 nothing could use more fixing than my Grunkle Stan.
00:19:26,706 --> 00:19:28,879 Also, women live longer than men, so your dating pool is smaller,
00:19:28,943 --> 00:19:30,413 and you should really lower your standards.
00:19:30,669 --> 00:19:33,323 So, Lazy Susan. What do you say?
00:19:38,821 --> 00:19:41,379 Hey. Here's my number.
00:19:41,698 --> 00:19:43,712 Why don't you give me a call sometime?
00:19:44,256 --> 00:19:46,654 -Really? -Really!
00:19:47,069 --> 00:19:51,737 Also, here's some pie. On the house. For you.
00:19:53,751 --> 00:19:56,883 We did it! When are you going to call? You want to call now?
00:19:56,947 --> 00:19:58,801 I don't have a phone. Let's buy a phone.
00:19:58,865 --> 00:20:00,975 We can put it on a credit card. Let's get a credit card.
00:20:01,039 --> 00:20:03,053 Mabel! Let a man enjoy his pie, huh?
00:20:05,770 --> 00:20:09,542 Dipper! It's me, Mabel! I'm looking at you through the glass!
00:20:09,606 --> 00:20:13,443 Right here. This is my voice! I'm talking to you from inside!
00:20:15,073 --> 00:20:16,607 -Did you see me through the... -Yes.
00:20:16,672 --> 00:20:17,662 What's wrong?
00:20:17,823 --> 00:20:19,420 -I don't want to talk about it. -Good.
00:20:19,485 --> 00:20:21,659 It's just these half-man, half-bull humanoids
00:20:21,722 --> 00:20:23,417 -were hanging out with me... -Here we go.
00:20:23,481 --> 00:20:26,454 But then they wanted me to do this really tough, horrible thing,
00:20:26,517 --> 00:20:28,756 but it just wasn't right. So I said no.
00:20:28,947 --> 00:20:31,057 You were your own man and you stood up for yourself.
00:20:31,537 --> 00:20:33,199 -Huh? -You did what was right,
00:20:33,263 --> 00:20:34,477 even though no one agreed with you.
00:20:34,669 --> 00:20:37,003 Sounds pretty manly to me. But what do I know?
00:20:38,058 --> 00:20:41,031 Wait a minute. Do my eyes deceive me?
00:20:41,319 --> 00:20:42,725 You have a chest hair!
00:20:44,164 --> 00:20:45,314 You're right! I do!
00:20:45,379 --> 00:20:48,287 This is amazing! I really do!
00:20:48,383 --> 00:20:50,973 Take that, man tester! Take that, Pituitor!
00:20:51,101 --> 00:20:53,946 -Pituitor? -This guy has chest hair!
00:20:55,449 --> 00:20:57,175 Scrap-book-or-tunity!
00:20:58,965 --> 00:21:00,819 Don't worry, kid. If you're anything like me,
00:21:00,883 --> 00:21:02,194 there's more where that came from.
00:21:02,993 --> 00:21:04,624 Oh, gross!
00:21:08,172 --> 00:21:09,578 Seriously, that's disgusting.
00:21:11,017 --> 00:21:12,200 Oh, not again!
00:21:13,670 --> 00:21:15,557 Message number 36.
00:21:15,812 --> 00:21:19,648 Hey, handsome. It's me Lazy Susan, calling to say hi.
00:21:19,808 --> 00:21:23,900 Hi! My cats also wanted to say hi.
00:21:23,964 --> 00:21:25,850 Say hi, Donald.
00:21:25,946 --> 00:21:28,344 Good. Sandy, you say hi.
00:21:28,408 --> 00:21:30,933 Mr. Catface, now it's your turn to say...
00:21:30,997 --> 00:21:32,691 Mr. Catface!
00:21:32,755 --> 00:21:35,345 Anyway, call me! Call me back!
00:21:35,441 --> 00:21:36,783 How do I get out of this?

00:00:04,219 --> 00:00:06,298 Подарки на Рождество нужно покупать заранее!
00:00:06,937 --> 00:00:09,111 Скажите, у вас есть что-нибудь рождественское?
00:00:09,175 --> 00:00:11,125 Вот эти кристаллы.
00:00:11,789 --> 00:00:13,630 На вид как разбитое стекло.
00:00:13,682 --> 00:00:14,706 Вы что, коп?
00:00:14,833 --> 00:00:16,336 Oй! А это что такое?
00:00:17,262 --> 00:00:18,221 Дядя Стэн.
00:00:18,286 --> 00:00:19,693 Давай сходим в кафешку?
00:00:19,756 --> 00:00:22,218 Мы проголодались.
00:00:22,282 --> 00:00:23,912 Очень сильно.
00:00:27,749 --> 00:00:30,178 Хорошо. Как только болван что-нибудь купит.
00:00:30,242 --> 00:00:32,288 А у вас есть такая же, но без рыбы?
00:00:33,023 --> 00:00:34,717 Я предлагаю запереть его тут.
00:00:35,947 --> 00:00:36,747 ЗАКРЫТО
00:00:38,010 --> 00:00:39,992 Майка с пумой, майка с пантерой.
00:00:40,056 --> 00:00:42,389 Майка с пумой, майка с пантерой.
00:00:42,454 --> 00:00:43,956 Майка с пумой!
00:00:45,427 --> 00:00:46,386 С пантерой.
00:01:02,984 --> 00:01:05,484 ДИППЕР
00:01:07,350 --> 00:01:08,650 МЭЙБЛ
00:01:09,855 --> 00:01:11,155 СТЭН
00:01:21,391 --> 00:01:23,091 ГРАВИТИ ФОЛЗ
00:01:25,331 --> 00:01:28,164 КАФЕШКА У НАС ЕСТЬ ЕДА
00:01:30,374 --> 00:01:32,963 Уходи! Убирайся!
00:01:35,265 --> 00:01:37,503 Кофе! Кофе! Кофе! Кофе!
00:01:38,174 --> 00:01:40,124 Давай! Давай! Давай! Давай!
00:01:46,486 --> 00:01:49,139 Ленивая Сьюзан, ты ж моя красавица!
00:01:49,203 --> 00:01:50,706 Почему вчера тебя не было?
00:01:50,833 --> 00:01:52,495 Вчера меня сбил автобус!
00:01:53,679 --> 00:01:54,734 Насмешила!
00:01:54,797 --> 00:01:56,067 Спасибо!
00:01:59,304 --> 00:02:00,680 Вы порции делите, да?
00:02:01,095 --> 00:02:04,452 Может быть. Подмигнула.
00:02:04,804 --> 00:02:07,169 Отлично! Нам всем по четвертинке номера семь,
00:02:07,329 --> 00:02:10,589 девчонке притащи бесплатный соус, а парню – немного кетчупа.
00:02:10,717 --> 00:02:13,147 Но, дядя Стэн, я хотела взять блинчики.
00:02:13,306 --> 00:02:15,576 Блинчики из этой дорогущей муки?!
00:02:15,704 --> 00:02:18,070 Я деньги не печатаю. Лезь назад.
00:02:20,486 --> 00:02:22,286 ВЫИГРАЙ БЕСПЛАТНЫЕ БЛИНЧИКИ
00:02:24,101 --> 00:02:25,974 Спокойно! Блинчики я добуду.
00:02:26,094 --> 00:02:28,267 Я побью рекорд силы, и блинчики будут наши.
00:02:28,715 --> 00:02:29,866 Ты побьешь рекорд?
00:02:29,930 --> 00:02:30,889 Силы?
00:02:33,511 --> 00:02:35,716 Он сказал, что...
00:02:37,251 --> 00:02:38,466 Что? Что смешного?
00:02:38,754 --> 00:02:40,320 Только не обижайся, Диппер,
00:02:40,384 --> 00:02:44,135 но ты не очень-то силен для побития рекорда!
00:02:45,019 --> 00:02:49,270 Эй! Я, между прочим, силен, как бык или как минотавр!
00:02:49,335 --> 00:02:51,029 Ты уж извини за прямоту:
00:02:51,125 --> 00:02:53,490 у тебя нет бицепсов, и ты ещё пахнешь молоком.
00:02:53,554 --> 00:02:56,592 А ты помнишь, что было во вторник? Я помню!
00:02:56,784 --> 00:03:00,299 <i>Девочка, будь со мной</i>
00:03:00,364 --> 00:03:02,442 <i>Потанцуй со мной</i>
00:03:02,538 --> 00:03:04,200 Не входить, не входить!
00:03:04,264 --> 00:03:07,652 Ты подпевал какому-то дурацкому попсовому бойз-бэнду?!
00:03:07,972 --> 00:03:10,434 Что ты... не правда! И это не важно!
00:03:10,498 --> 00:03:12,959 Главное у меня достаточно бицепсов
00:03:13,023 --> 00:03:14,462 и ещё волосатая грудь!
00:03:14,526 --> 00:03:17,307 -Закрой, закрой! -Боже мой, какая гладкая!
00:03:17,754 --> 00:03:18,713 О, нет.
00:03:21,302 --> 00:03:25,234 Ладно, любезные родственники! Вы поперхнётесь своим смехом!
00:03:25,299 --> 00:03:27,377 И этими вкусными блинчиками!
00:03:33,067 --> 00:03:36,999 Ладно, Диппер! Пора показать этой штуке сильную мужскую руку.
00:03:39,544 --> 00:03:40,522 ДОКАЖИ СВОЮ МУЖЕСТВЕННОСТЬ
00:03:40,547 --> 00:03:43,041 И раз и два.
00:03:43,137 --> 00:03:44,415 Не тяни время!
00:03:46,749 --> 00:03:47,549 СЛАБАК
00:03:48,979 --> 00:03:49,512 СТАРУШКА
00:03:49,532 --> 00:03:50,065 СЕРЕДНЯК
00:03:50,164 --> 00:03:50,664 МУЖИК
00:03:54,138 --> 00:03:55,238 СЛАБАК
00:03:57,082 --> 00:03:59,115 МАСИПУСЕЧКА
00:03:59,153 --> 00:04:00,144 Чего?!
00:04:00,208 --> 00:04:01,742 Эта штука просто сломана.
00:04:01,807 --> 00:04:04,492 Она не работает. Ей же сто лет в обед.
00:04:04,555 --> 00:04:07,209 Наверное, шестеренки треснули.
00:04:08,999 --> 00:04:11,333 Она сломана. Даже не пыта...
00:04:15,201 --> 00:04:17,566 Да! Угощайтесь блинчиками!
00:04:23,769 --> 00:04:25,303 Отрастить волосы на груди!
00:04:26,933 --> 00:04:29,650 Не больно! Ха-ха. Совсем не больно.
00:04:30,162 --> 00:04:32,559 Боже! Мой внучатый племянник!
00:04:32,623 --> 00:04:36,843 Да ладно, Дядя Стэн! Ты ведь тоже мягкий и ранимый в глубине души.
00:04:37,003 --> 00:04:40,231 Ха! Ещё чего! Я холодный, мрачный и злой.
00:04:41,127 --> 00:04:42,118 Кушайте!
00:04:42,182 --> 00:04:44,772 Спасибо, лапочка! То есть, обычная труженица
00:04:44,835 --> 00:04:46,498 общепита и красавица.
00:04:46,625 --> 00:04:49,375 Дурень! Старый дурень.
00:04:49,694 --> 00:04:50,685 И что это было?
00:04:50,814 --> 00:04:54,138 Ничего! Не хочу об этом говорить! Кстати, почему столик не вытерли?
00:04:54,202 --> 00:04:55,480 Погоди-ка, дядя Стэн!
00:04:55,801 --> 00:04:58,869 По-моему, я поняла, что здесь происходит! Ты...
00:04:58,933 --> 00:05:00,275 -Нет! -...и она.
00:05:00,340 --> 00:05:01,299 Прекрати!
00:05:01,714 --> 00:05:04,528 -Проклятье. -Ты втюрился в Ленивую Сьюзан!
00:05:04,591 --> 00:05:06,382 Выходит, ты и правда ранимый!
00:05:06,446 --> 00:05:09,930 Только никому ни слова, ясно? Да, да, признаю!
00:05:10,058 --> 00:05:11,465 Я бы хотел ей понравиться.
00:05:11,529 --> 00:05:13,159 Но я давно ни за кем не ухаживал
00:05:13,222 --> 00:05:14,438 и всё забыл!
00:05:14,502 --> 00:05:16,643 Посмотри на неё! Такая красавица.
00:05:16,708 --> 00:05:19,169 Крутитесь, чертовы пироги! Крутитесь!
00:05:19,681 --> 00:05:23,900 Дядя Стэн, ты старый, жадный, сумасшедший человек,
00:05:23,964 --> 00:05:26,042 но Ленивая Сьюзан в тебя влюбится,
00:05:26,106 --> 00:05:28,408 потому что нет в мире силы сильнее, чем...
00:05:28,471 --> 00:05:30,006 -Любовь? -Мэйбл!
00:05:30,837 --> 00:05:32,436 За нашу победу!
00:05:35,888 --> 00:05:39,437 Недостаточно силен! Дурацкая кафешка! Дурацкий дровосек!
00:05:41,674 --> 00:05:45,575 Еще один гидрант сломался! Просто какая-то загадка!
00:05:45,798 --> 00:05:48,100 Предлагаю снять форму и побегать по кругу.
00:05:48,675 --> 00:05:50,050 Опять читаешь мои мысли?
00:05:54,142 --> 00:05:57,211 О, извини, малыш, а где магазин женской одежды?
00:05:57,467 --> 00:06:00,056 По-вашему, я должен это знать?!
00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:01,207 Почему вы решили?
00:06:01,270 --> 00:06:04,372 Потому что я не мужик? Потому что не достаточно силен? На это намекаете?
00:06:04,435 --> 00:06:05,490 Ты плачешь?
00:06:09,998 --> 00:06:11,884 Два.
00:06:11,948 --> 00:06:13,354 Три.
00:06:14,826 --> 00:06:16,583 Четыре.
00:06:19,365 --> 00:06:20,995 Ни одного волоска!
00:06:21,059 --> 00:06:23,936 Дело в физиологии, психологии, в чём здесь секрет?
00:06:25,293 --> 00:06:26,980 «Нужна помощь? Съешь чипсы с беконом»
00:06:27,005 --> 00:06:29,179 Да, ты прав, мужик. Помощь нужна.
00:06:35,349 --> 00:06:38,289 Ради всего святого, малыш, беги!!!
00:06:49,670 --> 00:06:50,757 Стоп. Извини.
00:07:12,975 --> 00:07:15,852 Не ешь меня! Я неделю не мылся!
00:07:15,916 --> 00:07:18,729 И я тощий! У меня только кожа да кости, кости и сухожилия!
00:07:19,273 --> 00:07:20,523 Ты!
00:07:21,287 --> 00:07:22,405 Доедать будешь?
00:07:23,417 --> 00:07:24,076 Нет.
00:07:25,378 --> 00:07:27,713 Поверить не могу. Человек пополам с быком!
00:07:27,776 --> 00:07:29,151 Ты что, какой-то минотавр?
00:07:29,214 --> 00:07:32,955 Я мужикотавр! Полумужик, полу...
00:07:33,019 --> 00:07:34,297 ...полутавр!
00:07:34,393 --> 00:07:36,472 И что я как-то вызвал тебя или...
00:07:36,536 --> 00:07:39,668 Меня привлек запах чипсов! Бекон!
00:07:50,282 --> 00:07:51,776 Чувствую
00:07:52,935 --> 00:07:55,204 эмоциональные проблемы.
00:07:55,492 --> 00:07:58,594 Это верно, мужикотавр! У меня мужские проблемы!
00:08:00,863 --> 00:08:03,836 -Моя семья считает меня слабаком… -Угу-угу.
00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:06,266 И я проиграл в эту дурацкую игру на проверку силы.
00:08:07,576 --> 00:08:09,623 Слушай, ты ведь такой мужественный!
00:08:09,686 --> 00:08:11,477 Может, научишь как стать таким же?
00:08:11,892 --> 00:08:15,632 Хорошо! Залезай ко мне на спину, малыш.
00:08:16,196 --> 00:08:17,770 Ну, ладно.
00:08:17,934 --> 00:08:19,980 Да! Да!
00:08:25,351 --> 00:08:26,533 Осторожно, пропасть!
00:08:32,384 --> 00:08:33,343 Ух ты!
00:08:37,658 --> 00:08:39,320 Потрясающее место!
00:08:39,385 --> 00:08:41,526 Гномы живут среди деревьев,
00:08:41,590 --> 00:08:44,340 водяные живут в воде, неудачники!
00:08:44,403 --> 00:08:48,176 А мужикотавры обитают в горных пещерах!
00:08:49,615 --> 00:08:54,218 Мужики! Я привел сюда пацана без шерсти!
00:08:54,921 --> 00:08:56,200 -Привет. -А?
00:08:56,328 --> 00:09:00,292 Это Пубертор, Тестостерор, Гипофизор,
00:09:00,356 --> 00:09:02,754 а я Ограмен! Как тебя зовут?
00:09:02,977 --> 00:09:04,255 Меня зовут Диппер.
00:09:05,447 --> 00:09:06,657 Слабак!
00:09:06,717 --> 00:09:08,859 Диппер... Разрушитель?
00:09:09,434 --> 00:09:11,256 -Немного получше. -Да, вот это уже другое дело.
00:09:13,111 --> 00:09:17,298 Диппер-Разрушитель просит обучить его секретам нашей мужской силы!
00:09:17,523 --> 00:09:20,432 Помогите! Вы посмотрите! Это же кошмар!
00:09:21,039 --> 00:09:23,436 Нужно согласовать с высшим советом!
00:09:23,628 --> 00:09:25,546 Ну, будем его учить или как?
00:09:25,610 --> 00:09:27,593 Он – человек! Мне не нравится.
00:09:27,689 --> 00:09:29,223 А мне ты не нравишься!
00:09:33,635 --> 00:09:35,424 Они мне нравятся.
00:09:39,229 --> 00:09:43,609 Итак, Дядя Стэн! Вот и настал последний день твоей прежней несчастной жизни!
00:09:43,801 --> 00:09:45,910 Сделаем снимок на память.
00:09:48,180 --> 00:09:50,354 Положим в мой альбом памятных событий!
00:09:50,418 --> 00:09:52,399 Пам-папам, памятные события!
00:09:52,975 --> 00:09:54,893 Плим! Начнем с ролевой игры!
00:09:55,117 --> 00:09:56,556 Зус сыграет Ленивую Сьюзан.
00:09:57,035 --> 00:09:58,314 Я мягкий, как женщина.
00:09:58,537 --> 00:10:00,999 Дядя Стэн, покажи, как ты подходишь к женщине!
00:10:01,414 --> 00:10:04,579 Главное помни, что здесь тебя никто не будет критиковать!
00:10:04,643 --> 00:10:07,616 А я, как жюри, оценю тебя по шкале от одного до десяти.
00:10:12,508 --> 00:10:13,594 Доллар не одолжишь?
00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:16,951 Будет сложнее, чем я думала.
00:10:17,143 --> 00:10:19,509 После долгих дебатов мы решили,
00:10:19,573 --> 00:10:22,258 что не будем обучать тебя нашим секретам, пацан.
00:10:22,609 --> 00:10:23,760 Не будем!
00:10:24,208 --> 00:10:25,327 Не будете?!
00:10:26,541 --> 00:10:28,715 Ладно плевать! Всё понятно!
00:10:28,843 --> 00:10:31,177 Думаете, что меня будет сложно тренировать?
00:10:31,336 --> 00:10:33,894 А может вы просто боитесь попробовать?
00:10:35,364 --> 00:10:36,867 Боимся попробовать?!
00:10:36,995 --> 00:10:38,306 Разрушитель!
00:10:38,370 --> 00:10:39,872 Боимся попробовать?
00:10:40,064 --> 00:10:41,214 Ляпнул, не подумав!
00:10:41,279 --> 00:10:44,859 У меня три игрек хромосомы, шесть кадыков,
00:10:44,923 --> 00:10:47,928 квадраты на прессе и кулаки на сосках!
00:10:48,472 --> 00:10:51,349 И при всём при этом ты боишься научить меня быть мужиком!
00:10:51,636 --> 00:10:53,650 Эй, вы слышите эти звуки?
00:10:54,770 --> 00:10:56,847 Как это странно.
00:10:56,911 --> 00:10:58,381 Это...
00:10:58,446 --> 00:11:00,491 как будто целая толпа цыплят!
00:11:02,793 --> 00:11:03,976 Странно все это.
00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:06,789 Этот парень использует промывку мозгов!
00:11:07,300 --> 00:11:09,379 После второго раунда дебатов
00:11:09,570 --> 00:11:12,000 мы все-таки решили сделать тебя мужиком!
00:11:12,224 --> 00:11:14,366 Мужик! Мужик! Мужик! Мужик!
00:11:14,526 --> 00:11:17,595 Класс! Спасибо вам, ребята. Поверьте, я вас не подведу.
00:11:20,247 --> 00:11:22,613 Мужик должен уметь побеждать свой страх.
00:11:23,029 --> 00:11:28,528 Твое первое испытание: нужно засунуть кулак в отверстие боли!
00:11:29,862 --> 00:11:31,001 Куда?
00:11:31,095 --> 00:11:32,428 ОТВЕРСТИЕ БОЛИ
00:11:32,460 --> 00:11:34,026 В отверстие боли.
00:11:41,091 --> 00:11:42,626 А это точно необходимо?
00:11:42,689 --> 00:11:44,352 Ну, ты же хочешь стать мужиком?
00:11:44,544 --> 00:11:47,037 Мужик! Мужик! Мужик! Мужик! Мужик! Мужик!
00:11:52,919 --> 00:11:56,659 Ладно! Теперь мы будем вытаскивать на свет твою внутреннюю красоту!
00:11:57,139 --> 00:11:58,225 Улыбнись пошире.
00:11:59,568 --> 00:12:00,727 Шире!
00:12:01,519 --> 00:12:03,053 Отлично! Зус!
00:12:03,500 --> 00:12:05,163 -Чего, красотка? -Что скажешь?
00:12:10,206 --> 00:12:13,131 Тут нужна очень мощная мотивирующая музыка.
00:12:13,274 --> 00:12:14,674 ТРЕНИРОВОЧНЫЙ СБОРНИК
00:12:15,057 --> 00:12:15,590 ВКЛЮЧИТЬ
00:12:17,502 --> 00:12:19,228 <i>Пусть не верят в тебя</i>
00:12:19,293 --> 00:12:21,722 <i>И забыли давно</i>
00:12:22,745 --> 00:12:27,029 <i>Но ты храни мечту И побеждай всё равно</i>
00:12:27,572 --> 00:12:31,633 <i>Трудностей не страшись И до конца борись</i>
00:12:32,028 --> 00:12:32,515 НЕ ЧЕШИСЬ
00:12:32,540 --> 00:12:35,608 <i>И то, во что веришь, не теряй Борись и действуй, и мечтай</i>
00:12:35,613 --> 00:12:36,435 ЧЕСТЬ СЛАВА
00:12:36,460 --> 00:12:38,409 <i>И научись из гидранта пить</i>
00:12:38,505 --> 00:12:40,552 <i>И дядю научи смокинг носить</i>
00:12:40,615 --> 00:12:42,821 <i>А теперь прыгай со скалы</i>
00:12:42,885 --> 00:12:45,123 <i>И сбрей всё подчистую, малыш</i>
00:12:45,666 --> 00:12:46,657 <i>Эй</i>
00:12:46,721 --> 00:12:48,831 <i>А тут я уже и не знаю, что творится</i>
00:12:50,749 --> 00:12:55,097 <i>Продолжай действовать и стремиться</i>
00:12:57,431 --> 00:12:59,285 Ну, кто натрет мне спину?
00:12:59,477 --> 00:13:02,450 Хочу сказать, что эти последние пара часов были, ну,
00:13:02,610 --> 00:13:04,847 понимаешь, я реально почувствовал рост.
00:13:05,135 --> 00:13:06,509 У меня шишка выросла!
00:13:07,085 --> 00:13:09,962 Глёрк, ну, ты сегодня в ударе, дружище!
00:13:10,762 --> 00:13:13,031 Парни, спасибо, что взяли меня под крыло
00:13:13,095 --> 00:13:14,629 и так помогли.
00:13:14,694 --> 00:13:17,123 -Перестань. -Нет, правда. Очень помогли.
00:13:17,187 --> 00:13:19,137 Я чувствую, что становлюсь мужчиной.
00:13:19,201 --> 00:13:22,333 Еще нет, Разрушитель! Одно последнее задание.
00:13:22,877 --> 00:13:24,764 -Эй, ты, кончай! -Сам кончай!
00:13:24,827 --> 00:13:26,745 Самое опасное из всех.
00:13:26,809 --> 00:13:30,326 Я 49 заданий выполнил. Выполню ещё одно!
00:13:30,518 --> 00:13:31,604 Да!
00:13:37,598 --> 00:13:38,498 КРУТОЙ ЧУВАК
00:13:41,547 --> 00:13:44,008 Узри нашего вождя Вождерора!
00:13:46,405 --> 00:13:48,548 Он самый старый или самый мудрый?
00:13:48,836 --> 00:13:50,178 Приветствую, юный...
00:13:51,968 --> 00:13:54,845 Нет, это его завтрак! Вот это Вождерор.
00:14:00,503 --> 00:14:03,284 Ты! Ты хочешь быть мужиком?
00:14:05,906 --> 00:14:06,865 Да!
00:14:06,993 --> 00:14:10,861 Тогда соверши геройство! Иди на высокую гору.
00:14:16,040 --> 00:14:19,972 И принеси мне голову мульти-медведя.
00:14:22,338 --> 00:14:24,831 Мульти-медведя? Это типа медведя?
00:14:25,119 --> 00:14:26,557 Он наш заклятый враг!
00:14:26,749 --> 00:14:30,746 Победи его и сможешь считать себя полноценным мужиком!
00:14:30,937 --> 00:14:33,271 Победить? Ну, я, правда, не знаю.
00:14:33,558 --> 00:14:35,500 Разрушитель! Это твоё?
00:14:35,502 --> 00:14:36,123 БАББА
00:14:36,148 --> 00:14:38,162 Нет. Ха-ха! Я не знаю, чьё это.
00:14:38,354 --> 00:14:40,559 Так, взял послушать у друга, не моё.
00:14:42,094 --> 00:14:43,213 Подозрительно.
00:14:48,455 --> 00:14:50,853 Я пойду и одолею мульти-медведя!
00:14:55,122 --> 00:14:56,112 Не больно!
00:15:31,420 --> 00:15:33,338 Я иду за тобой, мульти-медведь.
00:15:34,489 --> 00:15:39,540 Ну, ладно, Дядя Стэн! Вот каким ты был и вот каким ты стал!
00:15:40,691 --> 00:15:42,194 Мне уже можно почесаться?
00:15:42,257 --> 00:15:46,350 Нет! Нет, нет и нет! Тебя что, вырвало на майку?
00:15:46,829 --> 00:15:48,044 Не знаю, что сказать.
00:15:49,387 --> 00:15:51,401 Смирись, Мэйбл, твой дядя неисправим!
00:15:51,624 --> 00:15:53,638 Так же, как вертушка с пирогами в кафешке.
00:15:55,461 --> 00:15:57,187 Дядя Стэн, иди за мной!
00:15:57,602 --> 00:15:59,169 Можешь не надевать смокинг.
00:15:59,361 --> 00:16:00,416 С удовольствием!
00:16:05,115 --> 00:16:06,937 Да что это за зверь такой?!
00:16:12,563 --> 00:16:14,002 А, теперь понятно.
00:16:16,144 --> 00:16:18,413 Головы молчать!
00:16:20,268 --> 00:16:22,793 Дитя, зачем ты пришел сюда?
00:16:23,081 --> 00:16:26,725 Я пришел чтобы отрубить тебе голову! Одну из них,
00:16:26,790 --> 00:16:28,132 у тебя же их целых шесть, правильно?
00:16:28,196 --> 00:16:31,456 Какая глупость! Дитя, уходи или умрешь!
00:16:32,991 --> 00:16:34,142 Пусть будет так.
00:17:03,392 --> 00:17:05,502 Настоящий мужик не знает жалости!
00:17:07,101 --> 00:17:08,539 Ты одолел меня, воин!
00:17:08,891 --> 00:17:11,928 Исполни последнее желание волшебного зверя.
00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:13,558 Ну, ладно.
00:17:13,878 --> 00:17:17,107 Я хочу умереть под мою любимую песню!
00:17:19,057 --> 00:17:21,167 Пленка уже вставлена! Ты просто нажми.
00:17:21,326 --> 00:17:22,669 Да, да, вот так. Отлично.
00:17:22,733 --> 00:17:26,730 <i>Девочка, будь со мной потанцуй со мной Пара-пара-пам</i>
00:17:27,017 --> 00:17:30,693 Так ты слушаешь исландскую группу «Бабба»? Я тоже её люблю.
00:17:30,853 --> 00:17:32,867 А я думал, что я один такой!
00:17:33,027 --> 00:17:34,529 Мужикотавры смеются надо мной,
00:17:34,594 --> 00:17:37,598 ведь я знаю всю песню «Девчонка диско» наизусть.
00:17:37,663 --> 00:17:38,622 Я тоже.
00:17:38,685 --> 00:17:40,252 <i>Девочка</i>
00:17:40,507 --> 00:17:42,298 <i>Будь со мной</i>
00:17:42,362 --> 00:17:44,599 <i>Потанцуй со мной</i>
00:17:48,404 --> 00:17:51,632 Кто бы мог подумать?! Наконец-то, я нашел такого же, как я.
00:17:52,048 --> 00:17:53,103 Ах да!
00:17:53,167 --> 00:17:56,300 Я же пришел сюда, чтобы тебя убить и стать мужиком.
00:17:56,460 --> 00:17:57,866 Я принимаю судьбу.
00:17:58,090 --> 00:17:59,752 Нет! Правда?
00:17:59,848 --> 00:18:01,031 Всё к лучшему.
00:18:06,466 --> 00:18:07,489 Я отказываюсь!
00:18:07,585 --> 00:18:11,005 Но ты знаешь цена мужества – голова мульти-медведя!
00:18:11,453 --> 00:18:15,065 Послушай меня, Вождерор. И вы, Тестостерор, Гипофизор и...
00:18:15,257 --> 00:18:17,271 я забыл, как тебя зовут, бородатый.
00:18:17,334 --> 00:18:18,293 Бородатый.
00:18:18,358 --> 00:18:21,235 Вы говорите, чтобы быть мужиком нужно выполнять задания,
00:18:21,299 --> 00:18:23,025 и постоянно злиться,
00:18:23,441 --> 00:18:25,582 но мне начинает казаться, что всё это чушь.
00:18:27,245 --> 00:18:28,843 Да, вы не ослышались, чушь!
00:18:28,907 --> 00:18:31,592 У меня нет бицепсев и волосы не растут на груди,
00:18:31,657 --> 00:18:35,109 а когда по радио передают девчачие песни, я не переключаю,
00:18:35,268 --> 00:18:37,091 потому что в десятку лучших
00:18:37,155 --> 00:18:39,776 плохие песни не попадают – они классные!
00:18:39,936 --> 00:18:41,950 Разрушитель! Что ты хочешь сказать?
00:18:42,014 --> 00:18:44,379 Я говорю, что мульти-медведь – хороший парень!
00:18:44,444 --> 00:18:46,553 А вы – придурки, что хотите отрубить ему голову!
00:18:49,974 --> 00:18:53,363 Убей мульти-медведя, или не станешь мужиком!
00:18:54,257 --> 00:18:55,696 Ну, значит, не стану мужиком.
00:18:57,263 --> 00:18:58,254 Слабак!
00:19:00,683 --> 00:19:01,962 Позор!
00:19:02,378 --> 00:19:05,319 Парни! Кто со мной? Будем строить, а потом разрушать.
00:19:06,470 --> 00:19:10,913 Мужик! Мужик! Мужик! Мужик!
00:19:13,630 --> 00:19:15,389 Крутись! Крутись же!
00:19:17,626 --> 00:19:20,504 Ленивая Сьюзан! Я знаю, он не особенно красив,
00:19:20,631 --> 00:19:22,326 но ведь ты всё здесь приводишь в порядок,
00:19:22,613 --> 00:19:23,892 и если ты это любишь, то
00:19:23,956 --> 00:19:26,610 тебе обязательно понравится мой дядя Стэн!
00:19:26,706 --> 00:19:28,879 И вообще, женщины живут дольше мужчин,
00:19:28,943 --> 00:19:30,413 поэтому можно спокойно снизить планку.
00:19:30,669 --> 00:19:33,323 Ну, что, Ленивая Сьюзан, что на это скажешь?
00:19:38,821 --> 00:19:41,379 Стой! Вот тебе мой номер!
00:19:41,698 --> 00:19:43,712 Может быть, как-нибудь позвонишь?
00:19:44,256 --> 00:19:46,654 -Правда? -Ну, конечно!
00:19:47,069 --> 00:19:51,737 И ещё кусок пирога за счет заведения! Только для тебя!
00:19:53,751 --> 00:19:56,883 Мы справились! Когда ты ей позвонишь? Позвони сейчас!
00:19:56,947 --> 00:19:58,801 Нет телефона! Давай купим!
00:19:58,865 --> 00:20:00,975 Оплатим его кредиткой! Заведем кредитку.
00:20:01,039 --> 00:20:03,053 Мэйбл! Дай человеку поесть, ладно?
00:20:05,770 --> 00:20:09,542 Диппер! Это я, Мэйбл! Я вижу тебя через стекло!
00:20:09,606 --> 00:20:13,443 Я здесь! Это мой голос! Я говорю с тобой изнутри!
00:20:15,073 --> 00:20:16,607 -Ты, что, видел меня? -Да.
00:20:16,672 --> 00:20:17,662 Что с тобой?
00:20:17,823 --> 00:20:19,420 -Не хочу это обсуждать. -Хорошо.
00:20:19,485 --> 00:20:21,659 Я тусовался с парнями,
00:20:21,722 --> 00:20:23,417 -они полулюди-полубыки. -Началось.
00:20:23,481 --> 00:20:26,454 Но потом, чтобы пройти испытание,
00:20:26,517 --> 00:20:28,756 они велели сделать одну нехорошую вещь, и я отказался.
00:20:28,947 --> 00:20:31,057 Поступил как настоящий мужик, молодец.
00:20:31,537 --> 00:20:33,199 -А? -Ты поступил правильно,
00:20:33,263 --> 00:20:34,477 хотя все были против!
00:20:34,669 --> 00:20:37,003 Это мужской поступок, по-моему.
00:20:38,058 --> 00:20:41,031 Погоди! Это что обман зрения?
00:20:41,319 --> 00:20:42,725 У тебя волос на груди!
00:20:44,164 --> 00:20:45,314 Точно! Один вырос!
00:20:45,379 --> 00:20:48,287 Потрясающе. Это волос!
00:20:48,383 --> 00:20:50,973 Вот тебе, тестер силы! Вот тебе, Гипофизор!
00:20:51,101 --> 00:20:53,946 -Гипофизор? -У меня на груди растут волосы!
00:20:55,449 --> 00:20:57,175 В памятный альбомчик!
00:20:58,965 --> 00:21:00,819 Ничего, сынок! Если пошел в меня,
00:21:00,883 --> 00:21:02,194 у тебя их будет много.
00:21:02,993 --> 00:21:04,624 О, какой кошмар!
00:21:08,172 --> 00:21:09,578 Нет серьёзно, это отвратительно.
00:21:11,017 --> 00:21:12,200 Да что ж такое!
00:21:13,670 --> 00:21:15,557 <i>Сообщение номер 36.</i>
00:21:15,812 --> 00:21:19,648 <i>Привет, красавчик! Это я, Ленивая Сьюзан, звоню сказать «привет».</i>
00:21:19,808 --> 00:21:23,900 <i>Привет! А еще тебе хотят сказать «привет» мои кошки.</i>
00:21:23,964 --> 00:21:25,850 <i>Скажи «привет», Дональд.</i>
00:21:25,946 --> 00:21:28,344 <i>А теперь Сиани, скажи «привет».</i>
00:21:28,408 --> 00:21:30,933 <i>Мистер Царапка, твоя очередь.</i>
00:21:30,997 --> 00:21:32,691 <i>Мистер Царапка!</i>
00:21:32,755 --> 00:21:35,345 <i>Ладно. Перезвони мне.</i>
00:21:35,441 --> 00:21:36,783 Как от этого избавиться?!

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